Motivation and Focus

How did my friend Stan put it? "You rebel at all things that have to do with structure!" I could protest a little and replace "slightly resistant" for "rebel" but he is closer to the truth. I recently read a blog by one of my favorite therapist/ authors - Bellaruth Naparastek. She talked about being internally motivated instead of being rebellious to structure. So I will go with her positive reframe.

Being a person who prefers to be internally motivated as opposed to driven by external goals and structure, I must confess that there are times that this works against me. Instead of entering a blog post at a set time each month, I wait until the spirit moves me. When my mind, body & spirit are hitting on all cylinders - this works effortlessly.  During those times when I am out of sync, it means no new blog posts.

So I decided today to complete Daniel Amen's One Page "Becoming Focused" exercise for folk with Prefrontal cortex issues (struggle with focus, routine and non engaging environments).

My resistance to typing out this page was significant, letting alone filling it out. But I pushed through the resistance and noted that this might be a good issue for Emotional Freedom Technique (tapping).

So my one page "Becoming Focused Road Map" is now complete. We will have to wait to see if it bears fruit or gathers dust under a pile of papers. Here it is for those of you who resist thinking and planning ahead.

What Do I want for My Life?
Becoming Focused – One Page Road Map
Name:

For...
Relationships
-Spouse/Partner:
-Children:
-Extended Family:

Work

Money
-Short Term
-Long Term

Myself
-Body:
-Mind:
-Spirit:

This tool is designed for focusing on what’s personally important.  This "back up brain" page will help you keep you on track and serve as a road map. It is meant to be “bumper sticker” brief in style.
...adapted from Daniel Amen’s “Change Your Brain – Change Your Life”

Finding Your Zone

Remember a time when you were firing on all cylinders? 

These snapshots from our memory can be described as a moment when time stood still and you experienced mental clarity, a calm energy and inner peace.  These emotional experiences can be described as ecstatic, blissful, passionate, elation, euphoric and joyful.  These brief peak experiences nurture our lives and carry us forward with hope and expectation.

I used to think that they were random moments that occurred when I just happened to be at the right place - at the right time.  There is a unexpected quality to peak experiences, but we can live our lives in ways that prepare us for their appearance without chasing or trying to control them.

These moments have increased once I discovered that my attitude, expectations and use of mind management methods (like Emotional Freedom Technique) are equal if not more important than time and space.  Experiencing "the flow" is part gift and part spiritual posture.

TRY THIS...
The following exercise is adapted from the book "Mystic Cool." Use it for sinking into the memory and experiences of being in the flow.

If you struggle to think of any "flow" moments you may be reaching to high. Some of those our peak moments can be quite brief but often are located along the paths of nature, friendship, intimacy, creating, sports, contemplation, travel, celebration and work as a labor of love.  For many, spiritual practices like worship, service, prayer, fasting, meditation and study/contemplation provide moments of grace/flow.

1. Identify just one peak experience or moment of flow.  Then make a list of how that moment felt in your mind and body.

2. List out ten bumper sticker phrases that capture your "Zone" experience as a way to create a mental anchor for this memory.

3.  Tap on the EFT points while recalling your Zone memory for three rounds (you can say out loud your bumper sticker phrases from above - changing phrases with each point - this can make the memory more vivid)....

Follow link for instructions on tapping points.

If any internal objections rise to the surface when tapping in the mental anchors and sensations of the peak experience - talk back to them and apply the EFT recipe for clearing out your negative beliefs and thoughts.

For Example:

"Even though part of me doesn't deserve inner peace - I accept this part and embrace a calm and peaceful mind anyway."

"Even though the flow can't happen to me - I choose to be calm, connected and curious in this moment."

"Even though my life is to ________ (insert busy, stressful, hard, impossible etc.) - I am thankful for this moment and opportunity to discovery my resiliency and strength."
Enjoy the exercise and let me know what you notice!

The Importance of Time and Personality

A while back I wrote a blog about "Time Types & Attitude."

http://www.gcarpenter.net/2009/10/present-hedonist-or-past-negative.html

My father sent me an email with following video narrated by Professor Philip G. Zimbardo. I highly recommend it. It is worth the ten minutes of your time. You might want to read my article linked above before watching the video.



Enjoy!

Helen Fisher studies the brain in love | Video on TED.com

Does you biology pull your towards one person over another? Great talk about what is going in on the brain when in love. She has conducted some interesting studies by putting folk who are "in love" in functional MRI's to study what is happening in the brain when you fall in love. It is about 15 min. long.

Helen Fisher studies the brain in love Video on TED.com